Crashing Not Like Hips or Cars

Destruction.
You've destroyed me.

I've destroyed friendships beyond repair because of my stupid actions and the hole on my heart. I always think my friends hate me and that I'm not good enough for them, that in itself drives people away. Destruction. You've destroyed me.

Hatred.
I hate you.

Hate is so pointless. I hate you, you hate me it's all the same. So why do so many people hate me, when I'm incapable of hatred, what did i do to deserve this? Tell me please, Hatred. I hate you.

Love.
I loved you.

I loved him, or i think i did, why does he not see it. It's practically tattooed on my forehead. I still like him, love him maybe, too strong of a word, how should i know? Love. I loved you.

Envy.
I envy her.

He likes her not me. I know it, it's so unfair. I don't see why they never like me back. I mean I'm pretty right? We are so alike and still he likes her. I don't understand. Envy. I envy her.

Jealousy.
I'm stuck in jealousy

Why am i not pretty, or skinny, or have not flaws? Why am i not like them? Why am i not fucking perfect!? I try and try and try, but i get nowhere. What is it with the world today why is being myself not good enough anymore, why am i so jealous of them? Jealousy. I'm stuck in jealousy.

Adoration.
I adore you.

Ah, the people we look up too. The people we strive to be, the people, although we don't know them, make our lives better. Mine would be Fall out Boy, silly yes. But i know that even though i can't speak with them, they know how i feel and Patrick's voice calms me at any time. Adoration. I adore you.

Hurt.
You hurt me.

Some scars heal with time, while others stay lingering with us all our lives. I try to forget but i can't. Somehow though they make me who i am today, they make me a better person by striving not to be like them Those few individuals who just don't care, they might start off your friends and grow to hate you. That hurt never really goes away. Hurt. You hurt me.